BLOG IN YOUR FACE

Man, I have had a lot of anxiety lately. We move into our house on Monday (March 24th) and it seems like I can’t get things prepared fast enough. Jaci works 55 to 60 hours a week and sometimes I feel like she isn’t doing her fair share (and I know this is not the case…she is trying really hard with the time that she has). It seems like I can’t get up early enough to get everything done that I want too before work. It seems like wedding plans are never ending. I feel as if I don’t spend enough time with friends and family. Jaci gets really upset when I get so nervous and on edge all the time. She thinks I am going to get another ulcer and that was REALLY bad news the first time it happened. My health insurance is giving me crap and I keep having to put them in their place over a dermatologist visit four months ago. I feel like Jaci and I are spending more money than we should lately. I got stood up by a hero of mine that I was suppose to meet for lunch (he couldn’t help it, his daughter was sick, but still). Things are getting busy at church. I ordered my M.I.A. album on Amazon like a week ago and it still isn’t here. My dog has been driving me crazy with her anxiety (doesn’t like all the boxes and clutter around here…she is very confused). I didn’t get to send my Nephew an Easter basket this year and I feel soooooo bad about that. I have been working really hard on creating the ultimate March Madness bracket. I have been in a very heated discussion thread in a conservative politics blog called Braden’s Corner. He posted one little post about high gas prices and he blamed environmentalists and it just set me off the deep end. So, rather than be productive the last couple of days I have been over on his blog giving him piece after piece of my mind and it is doing me absolutely no good to get myself riled up over the debate with him like I am. He can be a real jerk and I am letting him get the best of me with his negative attitude. Don’t get me wrong, he writes a great blog and I really enjoy its content; it is just that he ALWAYS has to be right and if he is wrong he tends to ignore your facts and takes very personal jabs at people in order to avoid the subject…UGH! I will be writing a blog very shortly about my love/hate relationship with politics and how my feud with Braden is a classic example of it.  

So, needless to say I am freaking out about a whole bunch of things lately that I really just need to let go of and cast upon God through prayer. There is no sense in holding onto all these things and making myself miserable when God desperately wants to help. I have a tiny black notebook that I carry with me wherever I go and I write down almost EVERYTHING in. I cross things off as I have completed them or if I no longer think about them. Lately it seems like I am doing a lot more writing than crossing off, but that is beside the point. I wrote out PSALMS 55:22 on the inside cover to remind myself every time I open up my task/thought booklet in order to say a mini prayer. No matter what I get accomplished and what I fail to make enough time for and don’t get accomplished, God will sustain me. He won’t let me down. Anxiety is so unnecessary when I have my best friend on my side. Lighten up already, Andy. Enjoy the ride!