Why Suicide Sucks
DISCLAIMER: I haven’t been posting much in the past couple of days because I have been trying to organize my thoughts for the following blog. It is simply something that I have wanted to get off my chest and I even considered not publicizing it because it is quite controversial and seems pretty insensitive. If you are easily offended or you have a personal sensitivity to the subject of suicide, please do not read the following post. I’ve just been really frustrated about people taking their own lives lately and I don’t know any other way to express my feelings than on the keyboard. I would like to apologize in advance.
Thanks,
Andy
I recently had yet another friend kill himself. Yep, that makes about 4 or 5 people that I have personally known that have chosen to end their life on their own terms. This time around, whether it is because it has become so repetitive or maybe I am just growing up and looking at things differently; but this time around it didn’t make me sad. In fact, it pissed me off really bad. I am officially EXTREMELY mad about suicide.
Depending on the state you live in, anywhere from 10 to 29 percent of American deaths can be attributed to suicide according to a quick Google. I guess it is no wonder that by the age of 25, I know about 5 kids who have taken their own life. Frankly, with those stats, I am surprised I don’t know of more.
So why does suicide suck so much? First of all, the monetary cost. Funerals can cost thousands of dollars. That doesn’t include the cost of people that have to clean up the deceased’s body. Then there is the burial plot, the cost of accommodating relatives in town for a funeral, the cost for relatives to seek counseling and possibly anti-depressant medication to cope, the cost of relatives having to miss work for bereavement periods, the cost of having to manage (get rid of) all of the deceased person’s belongings and the loss of income that the deceased may have once provided for his/her family. All those costs could potentially add up to hundreds of thousands or even millions of dollars! How selfish is it to leave that kind of a burden on your friends and family? Ugh, suicide sucks.
Why else does suicide suck? The way people who are suicidal try to reason with themselves and the excuses that they use.
Nobody appreciates me: This is bull-crap. I can understand why someone would come to feel this way. They might have a horrible family and not very many (or NO) friends. But to take your life because of it? Puh-Leeeze…Anyone who wants to commit suicide because they honestly think that nobody appreciates them should go to Big Brothers/Big Sisters and one time (JUST ONCE) take a kid to the bowling alley and pay attention to their reaction. 
I don’t care if you are the biggest dork in the world to your own age group, there is always a kid out there (maybe even a niece or nephew) that will think you are the coolest person in the world if you show them a little bit of attention. And what about a pet? If someone truly thought nobody appreciated them, than they have never gone to the pound or Humane Society and picked out a dog or cat that has been sitting in its own feces and eating cardboard dog/cat food and taken it home and loved it and held it and let it lick their face and taken it for walks on a sunny day. People who want to kill themselves because they don’t feel appreciated have obviously never volunteered JUST ONCE at a homeless shelter to serve beans and canned meat to the most grateful people who literally have nothing but the clothes on their backs…they have never sat and listened to a homeless person with schizophrenia rant and rave for a half an hour about absolutely nothing but who are simply excited that someone is looking at them and nodding their head like they understand.
I am Worthless: Wanting to kill yourself because you feel worthless? I have news for you: That excuse sucks. You want to feel like you are making a difference somehow? It is so EASY! You could write a letter to a soldier through AnySoldier or AMillionThanks and I bet you $1000 dollars that if you include a self-addressed stamped envelope, they will write you back. I dare you to go and mow your old neighbor’s lawn and tell me you don’t feel like you are contributing to the world. I dare you to start a blog that reaches out to other people that are feeling like you do right now and when you get your first comment telling you “Thanks,” I bet you don’t feel quite so worthless anymore. I dare you to go to the park and fill up one trash-bag full of garbage. I dare you to go to a random church (who cares what denomination) and step into the front office and offer to do anything and everything you can to help out. I dare you to get in line behind a single mother buying formula for her daughter and slip an envelope in her cart with 5 dollars in it with a note saying that someone knows it is hard being a Mommy and wants to give them a hand. I dare you to coach a little league baseball team even if you know nothing about baseball. I dare you to join a club and run for an office in that club…There may be people in your life that think you are worthless and they may tell you that every single day, but I guarantee there are thousands and thousands of people in your community that would love for you to share your talents and ideas. If someone is thinking of killing themselves because they feel like they have nothing to offer the world, I think that sucks.
I Failed: If you failed at something and you are thinking that it is now time to kill yourself because your world is over…well, I think that sucks. What is it? College, maybe? Here’s a story: My buddy drank away law school and failed out in the first semester. His parents, who were paying for it completely turned their backs on him because of it and didn’t want anything to do with him. What did he do? He went and got his commercial driver’s license and is making extremely good money driving a truck now. He loves it. He’s not ashamed of it. If you don’t find your passion or your calling at something the first time, then freaking do something else! Don’t let other people tell you what you destiny is. If someone thinks that failure is justification for killing themselves, then they haven’t got a clue about the big picture of life. It is extremely necessary for every man and woman on Earth to discover that big picture.
I am in debt: I knew a girl that killed herself because she had thousands and thousands in credit card debt and medical bills. Can you believe it? She took her precious life and everything that she had to contribute because of money. The same thing happened to thousands of people during the stock market crash of 1929. People were jumping out of Wall Street windows. There is no amount of money in this world worth killing oneself over. NO AMOUNT! My sister had to declare bankruptcy a few years back because of some financial struggles. She met someone just like herself; they had bad financial histories in common, they got married and now are living in a trailer on an Army base and slowly but surely getting their lives back together. She went from having a a 225,000 dollar house and everything else in the world to living in a 200 dollar a month trailer and she absolutely could not be happier. If you have to, swallow your pride and see a credit counselor, declare bankruptcy or even file for unemployment or welfare benefits. You are not alone and have nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, you get a clean slate! Thousands of other Americans are going through exactly the same thing and there is always a light at the end of the tunnel when it comes to financial woes. Contemplating suicide because of monetary reasons is absolutely absurd.
“So-and-So” doesn’t love me anymore: People actually take their own lives everyday because one certain someone won’t love them anymore. They feel like killing themselves will finally get the attention of that someone once and for all. First of all, when you are dead and gone, that someone will move on and forget all about you. He/She will not sit around for the rest of their lives feeling sorry for you or themselves. They will find someone who is alive and who can touch and hold them and be there for them. You will be out of the picture for good. Look, heartbreak is an absolutely miserable and ruthlessly horrible feeling. Hopelessness goes along with it and can eat us away from the inside out. But I guarantee…I GUAR-AN-FREKIN’-TEE that ending your life over one boy or girl, even after years of a relationship or marriage, is NOT yours or anyone’s destiny. Time heals things and makes them all better. Killing oneself does nothing. Absolutely Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Even if you have to drink and cry yourself to sleep for weeks or months, that’s fine. I would even go so far as to say that is pretty normal.
Once things start getting better, put yourself back out there. It is easier than ever to meet people these days. There are so many clubs, organizations and online dating sites for people to get the socializing, love and affection that we so desperately need. Love sometimes does not last forever. In fact, people are so self-consumed these days that loving someone else is getting more and more difficult. However, there is one thing that has always and will forever be true: PAIN IS TEMPORARY. Another ultimate truth? Death is permanent. Suicide for the sake of heartbreak just plain sucks. It is just not worth it…BUT LIFE IS PRICELESS. Its a no brainer.
If there was such a thing as the most legitimate reason for suicide it would be mental illness. I understand that people have absolutely no control over mental illness that afflicts them. Depression and other disorders can lead people to do the most unimaginable things. I realize that mental illness most likely plays a role in nearly every single successful suicide. I am not that insensitive or ignorant of a person to not realize this. What frustrates me is how Americas deal with mental illness.
If someone had pneumonia, people would think they were foolish to not seek treatment that is available to cure that particular disease. But sadly we look at mental illness differently. If we have depression or anger issues ourselves, we try and over come them or cover them up. We see them as weakness and burden. If we see others with signs of mental illness we tell ourselves that it is temporary and/or circimstancial and they will grow out of it. We think that by being supportive family members and friends alone, we can help others through their mental issues. To me, mental illness is more serious than cancer, heart disease or Alzheimer’s. Unfortunately, we tend to take it far less seriously.
What makes this frustrating to me is that science is making leaps and bounds with medication to treat depression, anger etc. There are thousands of self help books out there and religious and spiritual organizations to help people get through mental illness. The United States government allocates anywhere from 70 to 100 billion dollars a year to help this country gain control of our minds! After all, our minds and our emotions are what make us humans and superior to all other creatures on God’s Earth! However, even with all of these things out there to help people with mental illness, the majority of it is still going to waste (so to speak) because people refuse to seek help. Instead, every 16 minutes in the U.S. someone takes their own life. That precious, PRECIOUS life that God so desperately wanted them to change the world with. Suicide sucks, but what sucks even more is when that suicide is contributed to a treatable mental illness that we failed to address properly.
This is Andy, signing off and officially stepping down from my soapbox…for now.